Day one of the Morning pages
* 2010-06-29 - 7:10 a.m. *
Today is the first day of my morning pages. I�m supposed to write three pages every morning. It's from this book Mike gave me to read. He did this process about ten or so years ago and when he realized I was going through a funk, he thought it would do me some good. The book is called The Artist�s Way by Julia Cameron. So far I�ve only read the first few pages therefore only know enough about the artists way is made by a path of mind dumping every morning. I�m ok with that except I have a baby waking up and I know she�ll start crying pretty soon. Then my brain shuts down and I go into mama mode and all I want to do is get her to stop crying. Which has been hard lately because I think she�s teething. I made coffee this morning�.it really doesn�t taste that good. I took great pains to clean my coffee pot but I don�t think I did a very good job. Ok, so she�s not crying. She talking to herself and kicking the crib. This makes a really loud banging noise. Ok, so if I were long handing this, I think I would be at least a third if not a full page through. I have very large and messy handwriting. Thus the reason for me posting my morning dumps here. *grin* You know, me posting in my diary every day used to be my daily, morning ritual. I would do it before I would do anything else. I felt good about it. Why did I stop? Oh yeah, I became a mom. Things are just harder with a little one that is totally dependent on you. I�m just NOW feeling comfortable with her playing in the other room for a few minutes at a time. The child gets into EVERYTHING!!! Ok�so the coffee doesn�t taste that bad. So did I tell you about Scotty? I know. It�s been a while since I�ve mentioned Mike�s good friend. He was in prison for about a year. Found God and then opened this ministry type organization to help integrate ex inmates into society. He stopped drinking and was really into helping people in need. Unfortunately one of these people in need was a 15 or 16 year old girl. I think you may have seen the story on television. Man molesting a minor. He�s the Godfather to our baby. I know this man. He would never do something like this�unless he convinced himself that he�s in love with her. �For God�s sake, Man! You�re 36!!!� You don�t take a child�s life away like that. If you love someone, you let them grow. You allow them to mature and do stupid things. Like go to clubs and meet boys. Have dates and let her break her heart a few times. Let her find The One that�s closer to HER AGE!!! Man�. Am I even close to three pages yet?? Probably not. Dagh!!! Maybe if I write a bunch of short little paragraphs. Like this one. Or this one. Or maybe describe how gorgeous the sky looks right now. Nah. I don�t have time. �Mama?� Yup my kid is calling. She says a lot of stuff now. She even sings the Hot Dog song from Mickey�s Play House. Well, she only sings the hot dog part. �Hot da, Hot da,� over and over again. It�s really cute. Well, I can�t leave her hanging anymore. X-out.